Fireduck

1999.12.31

The end is near. Who cares...stupid abitraty date system. It is based on a calanader that was fucked with by random romans and theoreticly based on the birth of some mesiah. Anyways...I don't think I will start my rant on that just yet. Oh no, my date format for this web page is not Y2k ready!!! We will all burn at the hands of an angry and confused fireduck who isn't sure if my last entry was 2000 or 1900. Ugg. It is all about design specs. I am tired. Fuck. Not really...can't sleep. Which is of course why I am not sleeping. Dman this desk sucks...if y10k dosn't kill me, this desk will. It is so ergonomicly fucked that having underpants gnomes throw rocks at my back would proabbly be better for me than typing here. Oh well. What the hell am I ranting about? I don't even know. Probasbly because I am avoiding what is really in my head, because it bugs me. Well,not really bugs me, but scares me a little. I am not afraid of failure...shit happens and I can live with that, but I am worried aboyut failing something that could have worked if I did shit correctly...which is kinda hard to do when learning shit at the same time. It is kinda like being thrown into a heavy construction building and told to build road with it and to get it right the first time...the theories involved are not complicated but to execute them well without experience is hard as shit. Oh well...I have done it before in a work environment...I can do crazy shit with computers and random equipment...I genreally can handle pretty rough learning curves if I have a grasp of the whole picture, but females are a bit diffrent. Oh well, I will endure whatever comes tomorrow because that is what I am good at. Oi. Maybeshit will even work out well...or maybe I will get some assisance from the arosicrate....hahah. Oi. Something else calls. Damn politics...one of these days I am going to get pissed and bitter enough that I don't care enough and just start fucking with people...I beleive that if I didn't care about the people around me, I could do all sorts of crazy shit. But I do so I wont. Life goes that way. Friends can turn, but with an old enemy you always know where you stand.. Good old Feist. Most of his books seem to be simple adventure stories that do well to keep me occupied and away from reality, but he often includes some good wisdom.

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